I suck at life…I mean I am really horrible at it. When I say this, people always tend freak out. They tell me not to think negatively or that I’m being too hard on myself. But lets be honest, how many of you can actually say that you are great at life?! You have everything together all of the time and you know exactly where you’re going in life. If you do, please help me get to your level. Maybe it’s just me. I am just a 19 year old college kid trying to plan out my future.
I feel like I have no idea how to do “life”. Every time I attempt to master it on my own I fall flat on my face. I have had moments where I think I have it all together. But that’s just me lying to myself. Then God taps me on the shoulder and I realize I am completely failing him. I have Christian friends constantly telling me to allow Jesus to guide me. But when I’m at college, allowing Jesus to guide me just isn’t the “cool” thing to do. Don’t get me wrong, I’m having the time of my life. College is the best thing that has happened to me. I just always seem to have this nagging feeling that I’m missing something. It’s as if God is calling out to me but I refuse to listen. We have all seen toddlers who are just finding their independence. Their parents call out to them but they run off in the opposite direction. Forcing their mothers to chase after them. I am that toddler. God is my mother trying desperately to reach me and keep me out of harms way.
“He was in the world, and though the world was made through him, the world did not recognize him”- John 1:10. God sent Jesus to remind us of how horrible at life we are! I mean, literally, everything Jesus taught us was a foreign concept. His disciples had no idea what he was talking about most of the time! It wasn’t until Jesus died and rose from the grave that we began to have our eyes opened to the light. We fight for our independence and want to prove that we can survive on our own. But we can’t and we will never be able to. How many more times will God have to chase after you. He will never stop coming for you, but even God deserves a break every now and then.